Long-term commitment test for couples
Are you building something together or just going day by day? 8 questions to measure how much real commitment there is.
Commitment isn't just saying "I'm staying" — it's investing time, energy, and plans in a shared future, and persevering when the relationship puts you to the test. This test measures four areas — investment, perseverance, future vision, and stability — in 8 questions and gives a 0–100 score to give you a concrete starting point.
What is commitment in a relationship?
Psychologist Caryl Rusbult developed the Investment Model, which explains that commitment in a relationship depends on three factors: satisfaction (how we're doing today), investment (what we've put in: time, energy, plans), and the quality of alternatives (how attractive options outside feel). The more satisfied and more invested, and the less attractive the alternatives, the greater the commitment.
This test doesn't measure satisfaction (other tests do that) — it measures investment and future orientation: the pillars that sustain commitment once the initial falling-in-love is no longer the only force.
How your result is calculated
Each answer adds points to a total and to four dimensions: investment, perseverance, future vision, and stability. The final score is the percentage of the maximum. The breakdown shows which dimension to reinforce first.
All the quiz questions
Do you talk about long-term plans (travel, living together, family, goals)?
When the relationship goes through a hard stretch, you...
How would you describe the time and energy you put into the relationship?
When you picture your life in five years, does the other person appear?
Does the relationship feel rooted? (shared history, decisions made together)
How do you handle differences in values or life goals?
Does your partner know your personal goals and support them?
How significant would the "exit costs" be (life built, shared friends, projects) if the relationship ended?
- Rusbult, C. E. (1980). Commitment and satisfaction in romantic associations. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology.
- Stanley, S. M. & Markman, H. J. — Research on commitment and couple stability
- The Gottman Institute — love and long-term commitment
Frequently asked questions
Can commitment be built, or is it only something you feel?
Both. Commitment has an emotional side (wanting to stay) and a behavioral side (actively choosing to stay and invest). The second can be cultivated even when the first fluctuates.
Does a low score mean the relationship has no future?
No. It may mean the relationship is new, that future conversations are pending, or that expectations aren't aligned. The conversation the result opens is usually more useful than the number itself.
Can the two of us have different commitment levels?
Yes, and it's more common than it seems. Take the test separately and compare — that difference is an important conversation worth having soon.
What about your relationship?
Take the quiz and discover your compatibility, communication, and future in minutes.