Toxic relationship test
Does your relationship add or subtract? 8 honest questions to see if what you live is healthy, fixable, or a warning sign.
A relationship becomes toxic when it repeatedly subtracts respect, freedom, support, or well-being. This test measures those four areas: a high score means a healthy relationship; a low one, signs worth attending to. If there's violence or control that puts you at risk, it's not a relationship issue — it's a safety one.
What makes a relationship toxic?
A bad day or a fight doesn't make it toxic: a repeated pattern that subtracts respect, freedom, support, or well-being — and doesn't improve when you talk about it — does. The summary sign is simple: over time, do you feel freer and more yourself, or smaller and more anxious?
How your result is calculated
Each answer adds to a total and to four dimensions (respect, freedom, support, well-being). A high score reflects a healthy dynamic; a low one, signs worth attending to. The pattern and repetition matter more than an isolated gesture.
All the quiz questions
After spending time with your partner, you usually feel...
When you want to see friends without your partner...
In disagreements, do insults or humiliation appear?
Do you walk on eggshells to avoid triggering anger?
When you achieve something good, your partner...
How is control over decisions and money shared?
Have they made you doubt your memory or sanity in an argument?
Do you feel free to be yourself?
- The Gottman Institute — contempt and the “Four Horsemen”
- Silvia Congost — emotional dependency (“If it hurts, it isn't love”)
Frequently asked questions
Can a toxic relationship be fixed?
Some dynamics improve with awareness, real willingness, and therapy. Others — with violence, control, or abuse — require protecting yourself and creating distance. Change is proven by sustained actions, not promises.
Is it normal to fight sometimes?
Yes. Fighting doesn't make a relationship toxic; what matters is how you fight (without contempt), whether there's repair, and whether you feel safe.
I scored low — what do I do?
Talk to someone you trust, note what you feel, and consider professional support. If your safety is at risk, contact your country's helplines or emergency services.
What about your relationship?
Take the quiz and discover your compatibility, communication, and future in minutes.